If you are a Delhite read this!

15 Important Rules in Delhi

1. The Other Side Law:

If my side of the road has a traffic jam, then I can start driving on the wrong side of the road, and all incoming cars will be rerouted via Meerut.

2. The Queue Nahin Rule:

If there is a queue of many people, no one will notice me sneaking into the front as long as I am looking the other way.

3. The Mind Over Matter Law:

If a red light is not working, four cars from different directions can easily pass through one another.

4. The Auto Axiom:

If I indicate which way I am going to turn my vehicle, it is an information security leak.

5. The In Spit Of Thing:

The more I lean out of my car or bus, and the harder I spit, the stronger the roads become.

6. The Cinema Hall Fact:

If I get a call on my mobile phone, the film automatically goes into pause mode.

7. The Brotherhood Law:

If I want to win an argument, I need only to repeatedly suggest that the other person has illicit relations with his sister.

8. The Baraat Right:

When I’m on the road to marriage, all the roads in the city belong to me. To ME.

9. The Heart Of Things:

If I open enough buttons on my shirt, the pretty girl at the bus stop can see through my maldeformed chest into the depths of my soul.

10. The Name Game:

It is very important for the driver behind me to memorise the nicknames of my children.

11. Parking Up The Wrong Tree:

When I double-park my car, the road automatically widens so that the traffic is not affected.

12. The Chill Bill Move:

When I park and block someone else’s car I am giving him a chance to pause, relax, chill and take a few moments off from his rushed day.

13. The Ogling Stare

If you don’t ogle and drool at every hot Chic that passes by, you’re gay.

14. The Bus Karo Law:

If I stop my bus at the correct place near the bus stop, the city will explode and blow into 6 million pieces.

15. The VIP Rule:

There are only 6 important persons in this city-Me, I, Myself, Main, Mainu, Assi.

Read the article

Is Anti-left Government really right for West Bengal?

Earlier in the times of Rajas and Maharajas, there used to be these Yagyas, where people had no ideas what benefit will it bring but still they had to participate. Election in India reminds me of these Mahayagyas, where people has no idea whether the party coming in the power is actually worthy or not still they have to go through the motions as there are no viable alternatives. For the politicians (and the aspiring ones), coming to power is like getting a hold of Aladdin’s Chirag (i.e. the Magic Lamp of Aladdin) or obtaining the map to Alibaba’s Khajana! Unfortunately, martyrs who died for our country in the pre-independence era never dreamt of such a scenario.

Election result in West Bengal is a good case to look up to. People are fed up with the Left rulers but in reality have no alternatives. The best substitute is AITC (All India Trinamool Congress) that doesn’t have any issue or agenda! The one motto, which this party has, is anti-left stance. Ironically, in the past even when the left was right (once in a blue moon), AITC opposed. Which is fruitful when you are away from the power. One of the major weapons of AITC chief Mamata Bannerjee is ‘Strike’ (Bandh), which is outright counterproductive for an economy. So, once she comes to power (it might happen in 2011), she has to drop her main weapon. Unfortunately, her opposition would pick up her dropped weaopon to weild it again her. And sadly, the game will continue.

In Outlook I came across the views from Sunil Gangopadhay, where he expresses his concerns over the capability of anti-left Government in the state of Bengal. Read on.

I had expected the Left Front to lose a few seats this election but I had no idea that they would suffer such a huge loss. Since this is the people’s mandate, I will have to accept it. But that is not to say that I am happy about the state of affairs here. What saddens me is the lack of an alternative in the state. I don’t think Mamata Banerjee will provide us with a stable or viable state government if she is voted to power in the assembly elections two years down the road. The lady changes her mind so often that you cannot take her seriously. Who is to say how long she will respect the new-formed alliance she has entered into? Frankly, I have no faith in her, and I don’t believe her party has any real issues. Its only agenda appears to be to oppose the state’s Left Front government. And why does its political actions have to take the form of such vulgar display? Sometimes, when I watch Trinamool’s actions on television, I feel like I’m watching a cheap Hindi movie.

But if you ask me how, then, was she able to mobilise such wide support across the state and practically sweep the elections, I would say it’s a groundswell. There is a craving for change.

People have lost faith in the Communist government and this is unfortunate. But there is no doubt that they let the people down with the way they conducted themselves in Nandigram and Singur. I strongly believe industry should be brought to the state—I don’t believe that a farmer’s son should have to be a farmer. From that point of view, the government’s industrial policy should have been given a chance. But their method of implementing it was wrong. They should have planned better and not have tried to take land by force. This was a terrible mistake. I think the Singur and Nandigram issues have played key roles in the present debacle. The firing on innocent people not only turned people living in villages against the Left Front government but also shocked the urban community. After Nandigram, I had written an article in which I suggested that the chief minister should apologise. But just because I was vocal against atrocities committed against innocent villagers did not mean I would have wanted to turn to Mamata Banerjee’s Trinamool Congress.

There seems to be a great deal of confusion on that point now. The argument goes: If you were against the government’s method of land acquisition in Nandigram and Singur, that means you are a Trinamool supporter. Unfortunately, the issue has divided Calcutta’s cultural community down the middle. Many of the city’s erstwhile Leftist liberals and intellectuals, all staunch supporters of the CPI(M), have now rejected them. Some have begun to identify with the Trinamool camp. But I think the two are mutually exclusive.

I think another significant reason for the Left Front’s poor performance in West Bengal is Prakash Karat’s decision to withdraw support to the upa government over the nuclear deal. People saw that as an irresponsible action. The issue was still fresh in people’s minds when they went to vote. And the mandate clearly shows that the people of West Bengal are not willing to accept instability at the Centre. However, we must remember that this time they were voting in a parliamentary election. Only time will tell what will happen two years later when Bengal votes again—this time to choose its Bidhan Sabha.

As told to Dola Mitra

Who is Sunil Gangopadhyay?